Life's Path (averted)

Also from the vault. Part of the same collegiate short story project.


When you're young (around 16) and your guidance counselor Ms. Mitchell is seemingly cramming collegiate alphabet soup so far down your fuckin' throat that it makes you hurl, don't blame her (she never made mention of David Marker as being "the only guy in the class"). Of course under any normal circumstances this might not seem like much, but the class was called "Kids are people too" and let's just leave it at that. Your mother keeps dropping hints about it too (leaving all your brochures neatly on the corner of your bed) and your father? well did he actually say he'd pay for a new car. It seems like every time you're sneaking liquor, the next morning is then followed by more collegiate Alpha Bits and you're thinking "Jesus Christ I have 2 more years of high school to figure it out!" They're just basically covering there own asses. It 's what parents do. They say things about going to college and getting a good paying job or it being "the only way to get ahead in life." Seriously, I mean really think about it. Say you don't go off to college and you get drunk and wind up pregnant or you wind up getting some girl pregnant. We both know they're going to make some reference about College, whether it be "If you'd gone off to college and been studying this wouldn't have happened" or "Well had you gone to college, you'd have a good paying job by now, you could afford to care for a child". They have a tight reign on you now (early curfews, no phone after 9:00) and for good reason...because when you actually turn 18 and finish high school (seemingly the 1st and last day of your life) you won't be under their watchful eyes. So they'll worry (naturally) and get you to study hard and do your best because in theory it will keep you out of trouble. Sometimes theories falter. Then of course they'll want you to go off to college simply because they've had to put up with your shit for the last 18 years. Which isn't to say they don't love you, it's really just because they want to be alone to enjoy their "golden years" or because they want to change your room into an office or a goddamn yoga studio. Of course the un-written rule is that after you move out, they have to take you back twice but the second time only half as long as the first time (you never heard this from me).

I guess it seems natural to continue on with school while your mindset is still there, but adults are weird that way. Ask an adult or goddamn anyone for that matter and they're going to say they'd rather be on vacation than at work. Consider the scenario: 18 years you've been at the same job, as a student, up with the sun and fresh off the bus step when it's already well into its descent (if that isn't deserving of a leave of absence or hell retirement, then I don't know what would constitute), so it's quite a contradiction on their part. School (noun: place of education) isn't really going anywhere, however the education system is. The annual tuition increase is one of the major weights on life's scales of injustice. In essence you end up paying more towards an education system that remains on a constant decline. If parents are footing the bill this makes sense then that they'd be pushing you into taking that opportunity. Their portfolios are strong, their interests and stocks are thriving and they wanna take the least amount of "hit" against that. I know what your thinking though and it's probably something to the effect of "you just said that the education system remains on a constant decline", duh, wouldn't it then make sense to take the appropriate strides now by getting the pamphlets and brochures and just get on with it before the education system gets to a point of irreparable damage? Well let me enlighten you with some free (no such thing) education. If your ideology is such that what I've said up until this point sounds agreeable (and it should to the extent that facts are facts and tuition costs are rising annually) and you wish to further your post high-school education immediately because you sense the economic crunch your parents could endure or worse yet, it's a blinding reality that haunts you, you foresee four more years in the lead cashier's smock answering countless service 90 calls trying to finance your education.